This is how it's going to be-so please be mindful.

Well, hello from your friendly shopkeeper! 

Friends, we are in different times.  Times that, we all, need to learn new things, adjust our habits, and be a little more mindful of our actions.  So here are some-observations, tips, suggestions, and probably a rant or two.  

Please shop local and independent as much as you can. These establishments make up your neighborhoods, they donate to just about every fundraiser you ask them to, they sponsor t-ball teams and the like, they hire your kids for their first jobs, and they're probably your neighbors.  So, please, do your neighbors a solid, and support them.  If you don't have the $$ to support-share, like, love, engage with their social media posts-and help out the algorithms.  

A few suggestions while shopping local:

Please look for and read and follow directions for how to patronize their establishment.  I know this is new-you didn't have to think about this before-you just went in and looked around and what not.  Now, in pandemic world, keep in mind that a lot of places have limits on capacity, perhaps shorter hours due to staffing and payroll or whatever-so if you don't intend to buy-maybe don't take up the space that could be taken by someone there to spend money.  I'm not saying that you have to know exactly what you're getting-but-shop with intention.  Establishments are functioning on fewer hours, fewer customers-but the same bills.  So, please read directions, follow directions-check to see if they're taking cash or only doing card, look for indicators that there's a certain flow of traffic to follow, use the hand sanitizer that we have to buy, look to see if certain services aren't available so that you don't waste someone's time bitching about it later.  Keep in mind that some complimentary services or perks might not be available at this time, or no longer complimentary-because we have bills yall-and it's hard to give away free shit when you're not making the same money, but have to buy more supplies, and still pay those bills.

Also, maybe don't shop in large groups, or be ok if you can't all be in the place at the same time.  If you're shopping with three of your friends, and the establishment's capacity, is say 5 customers max, consider waiting for your friend who really wants to shop in here-outside. Understand that if you insist on waiting until there are 4 spots open, we won't stop 2 people from coming in if we're not at capacity, so that y'all can come in together for 1 of you to buy 1 thing-it's just rude now.  If you really want to do that with your friends, maybe see if that establishment does appointments, or get there early on an off peak day and time. 

While we're talking about capacity-your kids count. And again-see above about groups.  Now, sometimes you don't have childcare and you have the kids, and you just have to get a birthday card for Susie, look it's rough right now; this would be a good time to consider if that store has a website, and/or offers curbside pick up. You are going to need to plan ahead a bit, and, hate to break it to you, but you should make that your new normal, because we're stuck in this game until there's a vaccine.  So, birthdays, holidays, etc.-until there is a vaccine, this is life. 

Masks, yes, you need to wear them.  Yes, they need to cover your mouth and nose. I would suggest NOT bringing your Starbucks or whatever with you, because unless you have the straw hole with cover in your mask, we're going to ask you to not take off/lower your mask and drink whatever while you're in the store. If this is hard for you-I direct you to checking to see if that store has a website and/or does curbside pickup.  

Do not take your mask off to talk/ask questions; we can hear you.  If we don't hear your question, we'll ask again.  This is a good time to remind everyone to project.  Now, I know you can speak loud enough to ask your question and for us to hear it, because we just heard you say "we'll just buy it on Amazon." RUDE. Then don't come in. Amazon will be fine at the end of all this-but Amazon is not likely to donate to Timmy's spring school fundraiser silent auction.  

Keep your distance.  Have we learned nothing this whole time???? Give people their space and don't encroach.  I know everyone is still recovering from the great toilet paper shortage of 2020, and now treats everything like it's the last one and they MUST have it, but you don't know where that person has been before you moseyed up next to them, they lowered their mask to take a sip of their Starbucks, and sneezed before the cup got to their mouth, and those droplets, well they flew, and they would have flown wide and far away from anyone, but you insisted on being right next to sneezy stranger-and now you got some snot on something you're going to touch and not realize.  So, please, 6 feet.  

As much as we would love to sit and chat with you at the register, when your done with your purchase, please leave. If your friend is still shopping, but you've purchased your items, please leave and wait outside.  See capacity paragraph above (we have to move as many people through in limited times friends!).  But really, Sharon will be out in just a couple minutes, she's finishing up, and will pay, all on her own, because she's an adult and can do things independently. I promise.  

Look, you may have to change the way you shop, dine out, get your hair done, etc.  It's inconvenient, I know.  But keep in mind, all of these people at these establishments, are exposing themselves, repeatedly, to people, and we are trying to stay as safe as possible.  We have families and friends that we don't want to get sick.  We have limited resources, so if one of us does get sick, it can be a huge dent in the functioning of the establishment.  

Keep in mind, too, when patronizing a local independent establishment, that you are, most likely, in someone's dream. They, or their family, built what you're standing in, they rely on it, they love it, they had plans for it before all of this.  We need our businesses to succeed-because it's our livelihood-but also our passion.  We appreciate the support of customers, we love building those relationships that you don't get elsewhere, we like being a part of your world in a small way-but know that we are people too. We are stressed, tired, and scared for a multitude of reasons, as well.  So, please be kinds and respect the rules and don't be an asshole.  

Thanks!

How do people function...

Working in retail you learn that the saying: "there's no such thing as a stupid question," is absolutely not true.  There are tons of stupid questions out there.  Questions that people ask that lead you to wonder how, exactly, they function on their own in society.  I say this having worked in music/movie stores, bookstore and housewares stores.  I'd like to give society the benefit of the doubt, but alas, they make me question my sanity at least once a day...if not more.

Now, I know-you're thinking-give people a break.  And yes, maybe I'm being a little hard on people who walk into a bookstore asking for the non-fiction section and when you ask what they're looking for they still say non-fiction; and then you have to explain that 95% of the store is non-fiction and categorized.  But, you're in a bookstore, why would you read signs...?

Since entering the world of housewares and linens, etc. Well, let's just say I'm not sure how people have managed to cook, clean, eat or shit on their own sometimes.  I say this with much love for the general public.  You are the best, and worst part, of any retail job.  But can we talk about something for a moment?  Ok, maybe a few things.

First:  Things that don't have a price on them-are NOT free.  You aren't the first one to crack that joke, and you are NOT the first person to miss the sign with the price, DIRECTLY above the item (or even on the item if it has a display).  Now, yes, on occasion there is no sign and something still may have a price that's difficult to find on the item-but do you really think I'm going to just give it to you for free? Ummm...no.

Secondly: Any retailer with an online store is going to have more online than in store.  Let's use our common sense for a moment.  There is no store big enough to hold absolutely every item in every size, shape and color.  It just doesn't exist.  And, as much as you may be mad that I don't have it in stock, I want to sell it to you.  I work in sales-I want to sell it to you, order it for you, get it for you, find it for you-assuming what you're looking for actually exists (which is a whole other story).

Thirdly: Do you work here?  I get if I have my back to you, it's summer so no one's wearing a coat, and I'm not currently helping another customer, so you're unsure if I'm general public or worker-oh and you can't see my nametag...But seriously-CLEARLY I WORK HERE!  If I'm carrying stuff, behind a counter, talking to another customer, stocking product, using a scanner, or if I asked you if I could help you 5 minutes ago-I work here!

Fourth: I get that some more difficult gadgets, appliances, etc. may have more bells and whistles than you need it for-so asking how it works is a valid question.  However, if you come to me looking, for let's say, bed sheets-and ask me if they work or how they work-I'm going to stare at you for a minute awkwardly.  If you ask me for a bacon pan for your nanny-and I reply-do you mean a skillet or fry pan-and you continue to look at me and tell me your nanny just said a bacon pan-I'm going to hit you with, not just any fry pan, but a cast iron fry pan that ways 5 tons.

Fifth: (we're leaving the stupid questions and just going with stupid) When I recommend something, and you go against my recommendation, and then return crappy item two days later-don't tell me you should've listened to me-just LISTEN TO ME! When you sit there and let me ask you questions to figure out your needs and tell me your life story, and all the reasons that make this thing you need important, or different from the last person who needed it-you're WASTING MY TIME.  I mean, if you know more than I do, as you've told me three times already-then just go with the crappy thing and let me get back to helping someone who actually wants my help.

Sixth:  I work in a very return friendly place.  If you're going to return it-just return it.  I don't need an 8 hour sob story-I've told you can return it-several times.  I only ask that you don't get all mad at me when I give you a store credit because you can't find the receipt for the item, that's, let's be honest here, is 3 years old and you probably bought at Target.  Just sayin...

Seventh:  I want to go eat-so maybe you should find it yourself.

Cray Cray on the Train Train

So-look for a future post on the shooting I witnessed.  But in the mean time-Cray Cray on the Train Train.

First-Bus Etiquette!  Peeps-let's move to the back of the bus when the bus is full.  And if someone moves-can we please move back and let everyone breathe some fresh air.  Let's be honest-being smushed up with some Chi-Town strangers smelling of post work-not so fresh.  So ALL that I'm asking is:  If we have some room to spread out, and YOU are the person making that not happen, you will feel my eyes boring holes into your skull; especially if you don't even squish in enough for those of us, who do have some bus decency, to move around you.

Red Lind Of Hell.  That's what I call it.  Can the red line be some interesting, verging on scary, people watching.  Yes.  But that verging on the scary, isn't usually scary funny, it's scary unabalanced person-and this could go either way.  Exhibit A:  Young man a couple mornings ago at around 6a.m. He looked clean and "normal" but, once he opened his mouth you realized that something was up.  It started with a "Hello" to the upper 50ish woman walking past him to a seat.  She being so kind, said hello back.  Her danger radar was a little off.  This simple "Hello" opened the flood gates of cray cray.  This young man was looking for something to do until his "date" at 8a.m. and was asking her opinion on what he should do.  BUT he didn't want to go into the "bad" parts of town.  So she politely humored him and suggested he ride the train around.  That's when he asked to accompany her and they could take a "special" trip together.  (Finally-she realized all was not well on the western front).   Because out of nowhere he started exclaiming how they (she and him) needed to talk about the Trayvon verdict (yes things got really awkward); she needed to talk to him so he could wear his hoodie...yeah-where do you go from there right?  I mean, we can have that discussion-but is this a discussion you have with a stranger on the train at 6am in the morning?  And do we need to have the conversation so loudly?  And what is this special trip you want to go on?  It doesn't sound like a good special?

Riding the Red Line during Cubs games is always horrible.  As if the Red Line didn't already smell enough like urine and vomit.  Now if the Cubs lose, which we know happens often enough, it's sort of a quiet depressing beer soaked crowded ride.  People sweating their miller lite out of their bodies while quietly sobering up, feeling defeated (oddly-cause it happens often enough you think they'd be used to it) -but Cubs fans don't give up-they really think they're going to go all the way every year.  I'm from Cleveland-I know that kind of hope-but let's be real peeps.
Now Red Line when they win?  KILL ME!  It's every douche bag screaming like they just won the Super Bowl (and hey I get it-you have to savor EVERY win, because it might just be your last).  But really-if I wanted to go to a Wrigleyville Bar-I would have.  But the fact that your one "buddy" can't stand up, is practically comatose in his own beer slobber vomit dripping from his mouth, and is now taking up four seats and the old lady with a walker can't sit down; well, my patience has runneth out.

I relish the days I get a new train car on the red line.  They don't have that icky feel-like you can catch an STD by just holding onto the rail.  Because yes-there are trains that I feel that way.

For Divergent fans-you will get this reference.  There is nothing more uncomfortable than the Red Line  in the early early hours of the morning.  4:30 am and I get on the bus; and it smells like a lovely mix of BO, trash and feces.  The doors close, and that's when you realize that you're on the equivalent of a Factionless train.  At any point one of these people can turn on you for no other reason than you woke them up-BECAUSE-you didn't know that this was the sleeping car for the red line homeless riders.  (P.S.  Some look familiar from my days of kicking certain people out of a certain bookstore for bathing in my bathrooms).  Now I am all for homeless people riding the train all day and night-I would if I were  homeless.  However, when they all turn and look at you in unison, at 4:30 in the morning, it's like one of those moments that I can only imagine Tris felt the first time she got on a factionless train, or any touring prospective student felt during a tour, of the now closed, Henry dorm at Hiram.  It's FREAKY. And freaky in a scary way and not a funny way (unless we're talking about the Henry Dorm lounge-that's freaky funny).

Alas, that's all for now on the train.  Look for something coming about this shooting I just witnessed-cause that's some crazy shit!

A Year in the life...

A marker of sorts.  A year ago I got my new ACL.  I say that like it's a new car-but really it sucked.  However, a year later I'm almost back to normal.  Not quite where i would've thought-but I'm trying to not be picky. 
I'm looking at a possible advancement in my professional life.  A more rewarding personal life-as far as the social aspect.  There are still kinks to work out in the system. 
But all in all-it's not bad.
Car problems-but as inconvenient and unfortunate that that is.  I can't really complain about it-my poor car has over 100,000 miles on it.  And minus the car accidents, I haven't had any major work done on it.  And as much as I stress over how am I going to figure this one out-I look back on the last year and say-I never thought I could do this on my own. With no family in the area, a limited circle of friends.  But I did.  So I know that I'll figure this one out as well.  I just have to understand and accept that the end result may not be what I really want but what I have to do.

Where's my cowboy?

I must admit, I'm a sucker for a good love story.  Well, who isn't really?  I guess there are some.  It's not that I have expectations-I much more pragmatic and realistic-but deep down, when it comes to observing other people, I'm a hopeless, mushy romantic soul. 

At my last store over a year ago now, we were having an author come to do a signing.  We hadn't really heard of her at our store until her uber dedicated fans started calling and asking all about the event weeks before the scheduled date.  And they were so excited and beside themselves that I just had to know what crazy wonderfulness I was so ignorant of up to this point. I mean, she was a cookbook author-and I love me some cookbooks and cooking and cookware and cooking utensils and cooking appliances, and I think we all get the idea.  And this is when I realized that life was utterly unfair.  This author was living a dream that most women would give anything to have. Besides being this successful blogger, cookbook author, website builder wonder woman-she also had the perfect cowboy husband.  A real life cowboy. A cowboy.  It may be a cliche, but down deep inside of everyone of us straight women and some gay, is the cowboy fantasy.  A gentleman.  A person with values and roots and chivalry.  The stetson, the wranglers, the horse-it's there somewhere-however irrational for those of us who live in cities where the only horses pull tourist along a paved concrete road in a carriage. 
The woman who is living the dream for us all so we can live vicariously through her.
The Pioneer Woman. 
And now-NOW-she has a non-cookbook out with her and her Marlboro Man's love story!  Which most of us who have visited her site have read a lot-but she's added new stuff into the courtship and then she's added their first year of marriage!  And I thought I would just skim along, refresh myself and get to the marriage part quickly, but it was not to be-I am sucked into this real life romance novel like I didn't read almost all of it over 3 nights before she came to my store over a year ago.  And I cannot stop!  Well, i can for as long as it takes to type this little post and let my nook charge up a little.
I never took myself for this mushy romantic girly girl.  I was always one of the guys. Tough, willing to get dirty, a little compartamentalized (if that's how that's spelled); but this book has turned me into a teenage girl with stars in her eyes, wishing she grew up in the middle of nowhere with hot cowboys (because I'm sure all the real ones are actually hot...) and could admire thei physique in wranglers and chaps.
I've said that I don't see myself getting married; and now I know that's probably truer; because I've yet to see a real cowboy in Chicago and I don't think I could even contemplate the thought of marriage unless it was to a cowboy. 
Check out http://www.thepioneerwoman.com/
It's absolutely awesome.

I'm trying not to be angry.

Yesterday Congresswoman Giffords of Arizona was attacked.  In that attack 6 people died and 14 more were injured.  A congresswoman trying to reach out to her constituents, to listen to them, and meet them and talk to them at a local grocery store, was gunned down by a deranged individual. 
It's sad and tragic.  But I find myself trying not to be angry.  Anger is not the best emotion to carry with you.  But I just want to scream at people who still don't want to talk about sensible gun laws and enforcement.  It's not the gun it's the person holding it.  Well you know what-maybe it shouldn't be so flippin easy to get a gun!!!
To get a driver's license you have to take classes, get in car training, and then pass a test.  To get a gun, maybe a three day waiting period/background check.  And in Arizona you don't have to have a permit to conceal and carry. Shouldn't it be harder than this?  You have to be 18 to by cold medicine now, and Big Brother watched how much you buy, but to get a gun, you can walk into any gunshow and walk out with whatever you see and like. These are dangerous weapons.  I get the 2nd ammendment.  But you know what-we don't have a standing militia anymore, and we're not "living off the land" in most places anymore.  And if you are a hunter, quite frankly you should be forced to eat what you kill, because otherwise you're wasting a life.  Wasting a life!  This isn't a video game, there are no other lives after that one. And humans aren't the end all species here.  God is.  And every creature is God's creature.
It just should not be this easy for something like this to happen.  It shouldn't.  And you know what,  I'll sacrifice the 2nd ammendment so that practicing the first is safe!  Get up there and spit out all the disgusting, ignorant, stupid statements you want-I won't shoot you for it.  I may yell back, but at least we can do that without worrying that one of us will be dead at the end.
So, I'm trying not to get angry, but it's hard. 

It's Beginning to Look...

Oh December is here-and finally with it snow.  So if you weren't in the holiday spirit before, you should be now.  And for the most part I am. If I weren't so annoyed with my roommate maybe it'd be a little better, but I won't let him ruin the season. 

The city with snow is pretty-as long as you don't look at the ground.  It can look less pretty after everyone's tredged and driven through it.  However, keep your eyes up and looking at lights twinkling off of trees dressed with snow, and storefronts decorated with garland and ornaments and holiday accoutrements.  A smile will come to your face.  And if one doesn't you probably don't have a heart.

I'm trying to decide how to spend my Christmas this year.  Do I go out, stay in, have friends over, or just enjoy the peace and quiet?  I'm leaning toward the peace and quiet quite honestly.  However, midnight mass is a possibility.  My one catholic tradition that I try and keep when i can.  Far from catholic now, it's the only mass that doesn't completely bore me or make me mad.  It can be quite beautiful depending on the church.  I was going to have friends over...but all the work that goes into that, and I just don't know if I'll have the energy to do it all over again so soon after Thanksgiving.  But we'll see. 

Customers are starting to get the holiday funny in them.  Either way cranky because they cannot find anything on their list, OR, competely willing to take anything you hand them!  I do love when they just listen and don't question-it's like my little bit of influence i have over the world to make sure they're reading the right things. 

Still have yet to do the Xmas cards-can't find my address book.  So, i may have to forgo those this year. Although it makes me a little sad to do so.