Every end leads to a new beginning.

New Year's is probably my least favorite holiday.  I'm trying to give it a shot this year.  Using it as a point of change for myself.  To work towards new (or old) goals; mentally recharge and reattack life, take stock of where I am.  I'm a reflecter and analyzer.  I've been reflecting a lot lately.  And I do need to make some changes.  Keeping those in mind at all times and when I want to be weak will be the challenge-but I have to.  I can't let fear hold me back; change is not always a bad thing.  Change is scarier here because I often feel like I'm by myself-no extended family to fall back on if a decision goes wrong.  Makes it a little riskier.  Doesn't make it less possible or necessary.

I'm also grateful for what I have and the people in my life.  Even the ones I don't get to see or talk to often.  It amazes me how there are certain people in your life who, no matter how long you've been apart, you always feel like they've been there everyday inbetween. You're still as close, and whereas they may not know the day to day details of your existence-they know You.  And that is comforting and grounding and wonderful. It's precious-cherish it. 

I'm grateful.  And I'm going to be better this year. 

Vacation to me...

3 days off in a row!  Usually I don't like being off that long in a row because you have no idea what's going on or what's happened in the store while you were gone.  Bit right now-I am stoked to not have to go to work!  It's a mini-vacation!  I have a chiropractor appointment and a In The Hieghts excursion tomorrow.  I slept in today and will stay up late and read nonsense and sleep in tomorrow.  That is how a vacation should roll (well since I can't go to Hawaii).  I also have a Bed Bath and Beyond trip in my future (yay gift cards from sisters!) 

The house has been so quiet these last few days that I will be a bit sad for everyone to come home and make it a little louder.  But I'm not letting that ruin my vacation either.  Besides the roommate is bringing home new toys!  PS3!  Yay!  Oh Blu-ray you are in my future!  And games-i'm not a big gamer but I'm looking forward to learning.  And if that Wii ever gets back to this house that would be nice too!

Oh vacation!

Merry Christmas

Tis Christmas Day (or night) and all through the house we hear A Christmas Story on the TV set.  "You'll Shoot Your Eye Out!"  plays on loop in our head as the fruit cake does sommersaults in our stomachs.  A white Christmas is great when home with a fire but less than welcomed when roadtripping through cornfields.  But a star bright peaks through the clouds and leads us to our home, where the twinkle lights on the tree warm the front room.  Wrapping paper and empty boxes litter the floor with small children passed out under the tree, smelling the pine and sap and dreaming of the fun they'll have with the new toys and games (and snow) tomorrow.  As Ralphy shoots his eye out, we laugh and think fondly of past holidays when we were once young, and filled with pie and sugarplums.  And as the snow begins to fall again to softly blanket our houses in innocence, we fall asleep as contented as can be.

Merry Christmas!

A New Day is right around the corner...

Ugh.  That's basically all I can say.  I guess the stress is showing. 

You can't please everyone-and I know this.  It doesn't stop me from wanting to please everyone-however, foolish the idea.  And I usually don't stress when I don't-because I do have a semi-realistic bone in my body.  But something is going on and I have no clue what.  It would be great to not wear my emotions on my sleeve-it would be great to be able to hide everything like I used to.  I was pretty miserable then though, I'm thinking more miserable than now.  It's just a rough patch, I know.  I'll feel better in a couple days-can't dwell on this and let it bring me down.  It just sucks. 

On a completely other topic (bipolar moment)
Chocolate covered marshmallows rolled in graham crackers!  So good!  A smore without the fire-but still pretty darn tasty!

I Should Be Sleeping

I should be sleeping.  Work is only 7 hours away.  But I just got home and am decompressing. 

It was Ugly Christmas Sweater day today-what fun! It was a blast to see te booksellers and customers laughing and gawking and having a goodtime-all from some ugly sweaters.  But hey-whatever works!
It does feel a little more Christmas-y.  We have this slush they call snow on the ground now.  Winter is a little more present.  Although the weather has been so tame lately that it's hard to believe that people don't think global warming is happening! 

We put up our Christmas tree this week too!  It's gorgeous-a frasier fur!  I know I've already blogged about my gorgeous Christmas Tree-but I'm just too in love with it to not mention it again. 

I'm almost done Christmas shopping.  I'm on a search for something for one more person-who is proving to be a bit difficult-probably because I'm not sure that what I want to get him actually exists-but I do have a less personal back up.  But I am totally one of "those" customers now that goes into the store with the question that no one knows how to answer because I don't actually know exactly what I'm looking for because I don't actually know it exists.  Why haven't I Googled it?!?!  Ugh!  I can't believe I wasted all this time...!

Happy Holidays!

Christmas Tree Care

It's here! My first Christmas tree out on my own! We had one my first year here-but it was more Deb's than mine-she bought it, decorated it,-everything. So now Me and Joe have our own! Thank God my roommate indulges my whims like this!

So It's sitting in some sugar water. We got the nursery to cut an inch or so off of the bottom-to give it a nice fresh cut to soak up the water (and sugar). It will sit in it's sugar water and stand for 24 hours to hydrate and let the branches fall. So by tomorrow afternoon it will be ready for decorating! :) The house smells so wonderful! This has now made my Christmas cheer come to life.

Plus Krista and I went to the Christkindle Market tonight too! Such Christmas wonderfulness! And peeps are coming over tomorrow to help decorate. It's really the best times ever!

I guess growing into adulthood isn't so bad.  Happy Holidays!

elevators tears and emergenC

Well I got stuck in the freight elevator today. Just couldn't take it that it was really broken. I thought I knew the solution. So off of my partner in crime's stellar advice-being that the buddy system now be used in the frieght elevator-we both got in. Let me preface this by saying that the cafe manager had just gotten stuck and had to pry herself out because the doors wouldn't open. But I thought we could just ride it back up and bring it back down again-it would line up with the floor and everything would by ok. And my partner in crime-and her buddy system rule-decided to follow me into the freight elevator. And as i pulled the door down and the latch hooked-I had a small concern: what if it really is broken and now both closing managers are stuck in the elevator? Not that that would happen because I knew how to fix the issue. However, the elevator wasn't aware that it was supposed to be listening to my wonderful idea and suddenly be fixed. So the second after my that concern voiced itself in my head-it was reality. And we were both stuck in the freight elevator. Both closing managers, hanging out in the freight elevator.
Luckily it's spacious in there. It was a little chilly, because this is the elevator that goes up and down from our loading dock and it's drafty. Thank God my partner in crime thought to bring her coffee with her-and a book. The book just happened to be-Are You There Vodka, It's Me Chelsea. By Chelsea Handler. So there we are, sitting on pallet jack and cardboard, Chelsea Handler in hand; people breaking broom handles trying to pry open the doors, and pull levers and push big red scary buttons. All the while, no one's told our boss yet. But when she does find out she considers leaving us in there to "think about what we'd done." And of course-it's my fault that we were both in there-eventhough the buddy system was totally, completely and utterly not my idea. I did not force her into the elevator or any such nonsense. And yet it's my fault-go figure.
Finally, about a half hour later ( probably not that long-but I can dream), through brute force that no one else could muster (probably because they didn't really want us out of the elveator), our store detective rescued us from our traumatic predicament. I mean really-if we were claustrophobic or had a fear of...freight elevators, we could've been in trouble. But thankfully our big strong detective was there to save the day.
An hour later, facing a sobbing bookseller, who was upset that I had made her job easier (that's right I said easier), I was once again wishing I was still in the broken freight elevator. I mean sobbing! I don't know about anybody else, but if my boss comes up to me and says, you know what-we have people to do this so you can actually do your job today and not 5 different ones-I'd be fucking exstatic! I mean, I wish for that every day! I would love and not have to go and clean up other people's half done stuff, or run their department for a few hours, and then MOD on top of it all. I'd love to come in and just be a merch manager for a day. But not my bookseller. They would rather project all night and ignore the customers and embarass my kids lead.
And then I threw an emergenC packet in the detective's face. Right in his face-smack dab in the middle of his face. It was pretty funny.